In depth...

Here's where you'll find long, drawn out rants, on...stuff. Can't be any more specific than that. I gaurantee that they will be odd, random, fun (maybe), interesting (hopefully), and a every day stuff. You might even be able to relate. Be sure to write me with your thoughts, comments, questions, concerns, beauty tips... whatever!

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Well why the hell not! I'm gonna take a chance now the all the people I know are enlightened, so to speak, and right an updating rant. Yes, believe it or not, this one does fit, in a odd sort of way, to the first. You have now entered the mind of a crazy person... good luck!

Those stars have got me into more trouble than they're worth, but I think I have faith in them to help me out again. But then, do I want out? I don't know. How can I decide who to hurt...is that the right word? I'm not sure. I guess it's more like which instincts do I follow? And what will the outcome be? And I'm sure I'll get an answer, eventually, and the outcome will turn out, ok. But how long until it comes? Can I wait? Can the world wait? Time, timing, fate...
My entire world is sitting in a dense fog, a cloud, I can't see out! But not the whole world--I have two worlds. One I have to be comepletely normal, one is all chaos. But they're merging, slowing blending together and I feel like everything is slowly turning upside down. My own mind is ripping into at least two pieces. But the end is near... I think. You know what, I can't tell. I've lost site of the light at the end of the tunnel. And no one knows the way out....
PLease, let this all end ok.

Here we have Sean's advice on everything. I don't think changing names is neccissary, we all know who we are. So, he's painfully truthful, but rather right, so here it goes:

Sean: i think i have a special situation seeing this from the outside view from all of you. you are all being slightly foolish, but none of you have done anything wrong and that's the really wierd part
Kathryn: so what do you figure?
Sean: you want my opinoin on the whole thing?
Kathryn: yes, I do
Sean: now this will be a rant
you might want ot put it on your site\
ok well i have always said that the most important thing in life is to be truthful to yourself and to others about the way you feel. all of you are doing that in a really twisted way. you are doing it, just keeping it to yourself. the basic thing that makes this hard is that none of you are wrong. when you have a wrong and a right things are much simpler, but nothing here is simple.
We should start with matt.
the man was more than blissful the way he was with krystyna. he could've been that way forever. then it ended, and he now has to deal with the idea that he can not cling to that and needs something else. what he finds is someone who has been close to him, someone he cares about. he found you, who underneath it all he has always liked. however, he previously had the security of krystyna so he did not have to consider his feelings, now his security is gone. he looks at you and realizes he's not supposed to feel this way. this is not supposed to happen. but he is hurt by what happened and says, the hell with it these are my feelings and i am not going to change them. he wants to make everyone happy with him being with you, but knows he can't do it and knows that he can't make you ok with it, so all he can do is keep trying and sit and wait until something changes. that's why he tried to kiss you. he wants to keep trying. he wants you to forget about eveyting stopping you two and just let go. he has to wait and it's making it rough on him.
Now krystyna is really getting shafted by this whole thing. she broke up with matt, true by her own free will but that doesn't mean it didn't hurt her too. she is trying to see it from everyone else's perspective, but no one has really been talking to her. she's feeling like she's been left in the dark and now her eyes are just starting to get used to the light. she wants to do what is best for you and matt,
she wants to let go, but at the same time she is human;
she has a natural instinct to be upset about what is happening and knows what is right it's just hard to do it.
she is confused and feeling very alone
she needs time
she needs comfort and you and matt to be her friends
she needs something but doesn't know what. she is lost but she wants to do right.
Now we get to you, the little blonde in the middle of her wo best friends. what are you to do? you realize the unwritten rules: you do not go out wiht you best friend's ex-bf, it's just not done. but rules are stupid really, and you are kind of playing with that idea i think. you like matt, but you are loyal to krystyna. you see the reasons she broke up with him and see those as reasons to stay away. but the bottom line is you like him. you are friends with krystyna but you want it to be ok to be with him. you want to be happy but you don't want to put yourself first. it's natural. it's called being a nice person and a good friend.
so what do we have here then?
nothing short of a love trinagle really.
because love is how deep your friendship goes. one of you has to budge. it's just a question of which one. you are all being torn in two different directions.
so i cna only give my opinoin on what to do
so here it is:
krystyna needs to step back. she needs to realize that her friendship to both of you is what matters. she needs to let the both of you be happy and together and that will help make her happy.
you have to trust krystyna and know that she means it when/if she says it is ok. you need to let go and be happy. you need to realize that the problems will work themselves out as long as you go with your feelings.
finally we get to matt. matt needs to let go of any anger he feels with krystyna. he needs to be sensitive to her situation, and to be her friend and be happy for her no matter what. then he needs to just go with his feeling for you.
with that everyone gets past crtain things. everyone takes a step back and makes some confessions. this can make everyone happy if you are all willing to be honest and truely let go.
that is my opinoin and the end of my rant.

Another wonderful rant from Sean:

WARNING: if you are a republican or a Bush supporter and can not take
criticism it would be in your best interest not to read any farther.

What can we say about George W. Bush? Well if you go by what you mother
always told you, "If you can't say something nice, then don't say anything
at all", you really can't say much. However, I was lucky enough to have a
democrat for a mother who encouraged me to speak my mind. So we can evaluate
Bush in three areas: his past, his politics, and his presidency.
Well George W. doesn't exactly have an impressive past. He had numerous
run-ins with the law for things from drinking to drug use. He openly admits
to being a former alcoholic, and now claims that he no longer drinks. The
man basically rode the coat tails of his father. He used him to get into
college and to get out of trouble. The man has never learned to properly
take responsibility for anything. Now not only has he ridden his father's
coat tails, but he has also been president of an oil company. The same oil
companies that pollute and destroy our environment at an astonishing rate.
He has proven himself to be a greedy supporter of big business, with no
thought to the consequences to his actions. Now only in the state of Texas
could a man like this become governor. And what do you know? He did. Now
Texas has always been a very conservative state that has been a huge
supporter of capitol punishment, but during Bush's time in office the
execution rate reached a new high. Not only that but Bush also claimed to
turn Texas' failing education system around. His proof for this was an
increase in scores on state administrated tests. Which he increased in
number during his time in office. While the scores did increase on the state
tests, it is only because those were significantly easier than the national
ones and did not cover the same material. The scores on the national test
stayed exactly the same keeping Texas a sparkling 47th in the nation in
education.
As for Bush's politics, how could this man possibly become president? He
is by definition a relatively liberal republican, but he also has his points
where he is very conservative. Where do we start? Let's start with his
economics. George W.'s economic plan is basically the same "Voodoo
Economics" that the Regan administration started and that his father's
administration continued. It's the idea that if you give the tax break to
the wealthy they in turn spend more money and boost the economy. Now if you
assume they spend the majority of the money on American products, the money
they spend eventual trickles down to the lower economic classes. In theory
it works fairly well. However, everything works in theory. In reality what
this economic policy does is straps the government financially, increases
our import of foreign goods, and sends the country into a recession and
eventually a depression. Next we have his views on capitol punishment. I
know that I am in the minority when I speak out about this topic, but under
no circumstances do we as people have the right to take the life of another
human being. It is just unacceptable. Continuing on we can talk about his
foregin policy. His policy bears great resemblance to the ones of our past.
Times when we became isolationists' and cut ourselves off from the rest of
the world to the point where it took us several years and direct attacks to
get involved in the world wars. Right now there is no other real super power
besides the United States, and with how intertwined the world has become
politically and economically the world can not afford to lose the United
States as it's leader and helping hand. Next we get to his environmental
policies and his plans on how to deal with our current energy crisis. Now
the bottom line is the energy crisis is not as bad as it appears. The reason
for the incredible hike in prices of both electricity and gasoline is Bush's
unwillingness to regulate them, resulting in the opportunistic oil and
energy companies to take advantage of the U.S. population. Now his solution
of destroying national treasures such as Yellowstone National Park and the
untouched wilderness of Alaska is totally out of line. Not only would that
destroy some of the few unscared areas of our country but it would also be
foolish economically. In the time it would take to first drill and then
build the pipe lines to transport the oil back it would cost so much and
take so much time that off shore drilling would have been much more
successful. Not to mention the decades it would take to recoup the costs of
such a project. Next we can talk about his plan to save social security. We
really dont have a plan to fix it at the moment, and what most people dont
realize is that the money you are putting into social security is not being
stored away for you. In fact just as fast as you put it in it is being spent
on those currently on security. We need to find a way to fix it, but with so
many people living so much longer it is becoming difficult. For these
reasons I can not criticize Bushs plan for the fact that it doesnt fix it.
However, I can point out the fact that under Bushs plan social security
will be bankrupt in 20 years instead of 50 years as under Gores plan.
Finally we get to his medical care policies. What he has proposed does
nothing for those who really need help with their prescription drugs. The
over 65 population surviving on social security is totally ignored by his
plan. He thinks that by giving the drug companies incentives to bring their
prices down means they will. What he is in effect doing is rewarding the
prescription drug companies for ripping off America.
Now we get to the presidency of George W. Bush. Oh what a presidency it
has been too. The man who entered to office promising to bring the
republicans and democrats together is now finding difficulty keeping the
support of his own party. We have already seen one Senator switch parties
and there is a possibility that more will follow. Since becoming president
Bush has not done anything correctly. Within his first 100 days in office he
already mishandled and international incident with China. He continued he
run of mistakes by destroying the EPA standards on carbon monoxide emission
that had been fought for so hard over the past 10 years. The terrible
repercussions something such as the reversing of those standards is almost
unimaginable. He has doomed our environment. He moves from dooming our
environment to dooming our economy. Bush successfully pushed an only
slightly revised version of his original tax cut. A tax cut, mind you, that
is based off of over inflated surplus predictions from a time where this
country was in the greatest economic boom the world had ever seen. The
surplus is gone. And yet we are still giving a tax cut. Not only are we
giving a tax cut but we are also pouring billions of more dollars into the
defense contractors. This money is not just meant to give the members of our
armed forces a raise, but it is intended to build some form of new age
defense system to save America. A system that even if ever successfully
completed will probably be out of date with in 6 months of coming on-line.
From the military to the patients bill of rights. Bush went ahead and
backed up all those pharmaceutical companies and HMOs that funded his
campaign. He vetoed a bill that would have allowed patients to sue an HMO in
both state and federal court, with a $5 million cap on punitive damages. He
took power from the hands of the patient and merely secured the continuation
of poor and unreasonable medical coverage from todays HMOs. Finally we get
to Bushs actions concerning cloning and stem-cell research. What he did was
refuse to promote the greatest scientific advance of the past 300 years.
Now the blame over human cloning can not be placed squarely on his
shoulders, as it was the lack of foresight by congress that shot this down.
However, where the blame can be squarely placed is directly in his lap by
not allowing doctors and scientists to use cloned embryos in stem-cell
research. He has set medicine back 20 years. All of the fantastic medical
advances that can come from stem-cell research will now take much longer and
be much harder to come by thanks to our beloved president. His presidency up
to this point has been a total disaster. The only thing good to come of it
is that the likely hood of his re-election is almost non-existent at this
point.
George W. Bush is a man who should never have become president. Had it
not been for family ties in Florida and Supreme Court justices who were
watching out for themselves more than anything else, he would not even be
president. Now I am not saying that Al Gore was the answer to all of our
problems, but I ask you this: Could he have been any worse?

This is the official George W. Bush anti-rant. Since my political orientation is more
liberal than a K-mart return policy I actually had to sell my soul to the devil to finish
this, but anyway here it goes:

What can I say about George W. Bush? Well, I can say the man is a
sex-god... I mean he is a very qualified man and an excellent president. Oh, I have
heard all of the arguments about Georgy being drunk and incompetent, but lets
address all those points individually.
First, what does it matter that he has had some run-ins with the law. How
can we trust any law enforcement officers who have tried to arrest our messiah.
Besides, I can't say that I really respect any police because they are too busy giving me "speeding tickets" and charging me with "vehicular manslaughter", whatever the hell that is supposed to mean, instead of catching those really responsible for ruining our fair country; for example, people like Richard Simmons, Martha Stewart, and the Kebleer elves.
Second, one of our greatest presidents, Ulysses S. Grant, was an alcoholic
and yet he is rated as one of out 10 best presidents by historians nation-wide. Even
if our president knocks back a few bottles of Jack Daniel's now and then what's the
big deal, I mean have you seen his wife, shit man, I'm taking about bow-wow, you
know what mean. My god I'm surprised the man isn't always drunk.
Third, our president has not always ridden the coattails of his father. President Bush has taken responsibility and initiative in many situations. He owned and managed an oil company, he bought his own cocaine, and even today he has taken
several major initiatives to help our environment; one being that he has promised to
recycle all of the beer cans his daughters have used.
Finally, I would like to address two other issues, one being the economy
and the other being education. Our economy was screwed ever since Bush took office, and a recession was always on the horizon. Once Dick Cheney entered office, our economy was simply not strong enough to keep him going and keep our head above water. And what about education? Everyone believes that Texas is in such poor shape because of George W. Bush, but I ask all you cynics out there: have you ever met a Texan. My god, I have not seen so much stupid in such a big place ever in my life. Cow-pies in Texas have a higher level of education, on average, than Texans do. If you really wanted to give out state-administered exams, you shouldn't give them to students, but to the pieces of s*** that are out in the fields. That way you can get an accurate sample how smart Texans really are.
All in all I'm proud to stand up and say "That's my Bush". Good luck
George, don't worry we will find your marbles soon. And as my fellow Greeks say,
"Ainde na gamithite" and "God save the Queen".
-Nikitas

I wonder, is it better to do what is right, to follow logic and reason, or to be happy? Is it better to do what others consider to be the better choice? Should you suffer what you do not wish to bear because others envy that which must endure? Or should you do what your heart and soul plead you to do; what you know you want?
But can you really tell what it is you want? Is it merely a bit of maladjustment? Should you try harder to make that thing which you seem to hate into something that can be withstood? Should you challenge it and continue merely to see if you can beat it? But then your are insincere to yourself and your heart. You do neither what you want nor what you should for even if you are doing what others feel is right, you do it for the wrong reasons, canceling out any good of it.
But, you would be receiving the benefits that others see to be good. Therefore, some good will come out of your actions, even if those actions be right for the wrong reasons. But will you realize that you are receiving these benefits? For if you concentrate your energy on beating the system, you lose the value of the experience.
So it all comes down to which is better: doing what you should, or doing what your heart says is right. One would think theyd be one and the same, right and should. But there are times when they are not. What is right for you may not be what others think is what you should do. But then you say that others opinions dont matter and you should live to be someone you can live with. But you do have to live with others and endure their opinions as well. And if you listen to them enough, youll feel that the choice you made, to be true to yourself, was a wrong one. And then youll be left as indecisive as before, just more confused and lost. So I ask you: what is better, taking the path less traveled, the path that leads through your heart, or taking the path that most feel with give you the most of your journey?

I would like to take a moment here just to say how wonderful all of my friends. I don't even want to think where I'd be without you guys. Trust me, it is not a pleasant thought. I can hardly believe that you gutys manage to put up with all the crap I put you guys through, and you still seem to think that I'm an ok person. I love you guys. Everyone needs to search the Earth until they find friends like you, otherwise life just isn't worth living. I am thankful nearly every day that you are my friends. I have spent years hoping, almost praying, that I'd find 'you'. I put that in quotes for I didn't know who you were, I only had the dream of the perfect group of people. I am so glad that I found you. Some day you may actually know how trully greatful I am for all that you have done. Some day I'll be able to put it into words, words that I can actually speak. Just...thank you. All of you. You are, trully, my saviors. To all of you: Sean, Emily, Claire, Krystyna, even Pat, Andi, Christina, Paul, Nikitas, and everyone I have forgotten. And to you Matt, thank you.

Do you think you'll get out ok?